direct reflection

i think my blog about golfing is a direct reflection of the way i feel about golf. when i'm enthusiastic about playing and practicing, i update alot and even have inspiration to create polyvore collages. somehow the passion has been waning and it shows in this blog :( i don't update as often or as much as i would like.

i try to ask myself what i want to do from here on but i really don't know. i feel like i've gone back to a time when i don't even feel like being awake because i don't know what to do in my life. Making my whole life just about golf didn't make me happy, but not playing golf at all doesn't make me happy either.

My one motivation now is to get my driving license on Friday. That's in 2 days !! i'll have a new sense of achievement that will jumpstart me to create new desires.

One of my backup plans if i don't play professional golf was to become a golfing coach. I need to spend some time thinking over if it is something i will enjoy. sighs

the study system has made it so difficult for us to decide what to do in our lives. We work towards achieveing a qualification. good grades that we think can help us figure out what we are good at so we may go into that field in the future. but it doesn't allow us to seek our passion.

Speaking for myself, i did my degree in Finance and Marketing which i had no idea about before i started the course. I chose it because it sounded interesting and fun but i don't even know if it is something i like that much and an area i would want to work in.

Maybe it was the choices i made in secondary school. maybe most people are lost like me. everyone probably goes through the same process of discovering themselves and their goals in life. they just don't announce it to the whole world.

smile shuyan ! i am slightly lost right now but that does not define me. i know that i will be fine as long as i am happy.