mental struggle

sometimes i wake up and i have this struggle in my mind whether to get up and start the day or continue lying in bed so the time passes by and i don't have to think about anything

i look forward to the time when my posts are all about happy golfing times, playing good scores etc etc
but i feel my iron shots are getting better now. today my shots are straight but i often underclub. it just doesn't feel as nice to hit a longer club for the same distance. its these things that make me doubt my choice of new clubs.

i think i have stiff shafts on my clubs which thereotically means that when i am able to master them and play well with them, i'll be at a totally new HIGH level muah hahahahaha
thats the main idea motivating me and keeping me going now !

always heed the lightning siren

if you also live in sunny singapore, my favourite country, you would be updated with the recent crazy weather here. it's hot and sunny in the afternoon but come 3.30pm, the dark clouds just appear from nowhere. at 4.00pm, there might be a bit of sunshine. within a minute, at 4.01pm, it'll start to rain. and the past week or so has graced us with the magical THUNDERSTORM..... you'll see lightning flashing through the clouds and hear thumber, even the occassional crack of when you know the lightning's really close by.

today, i learnt never to doubt the siren to close the course. megan and i got stuck at the halfway house for an hour. and it was probably the most frightening one hour of our lives. i'll never think of lightning in the same way again.

it must have been one of the worst thunderstorms of late because the lightning rating was 29 !!!!when the reading reaches 4, they already close the course !

we could see the lightning flashes in front of us, to the left and to the right. no way were we going to step onto the golf course. we thought that the halfway house would be the safest place to be. it would have been even better if they had food and drinks there but all the staff had already left.

just as we were in the midst of taking photos, lightning crashed just 20m next to the halfway house. there was a giant ball of light in the middle of the tee box next to us. CLAP ! the thunder was so loud and piercing that my right ear which was nearer to it hurt. megan and i hid under the table screaming because it really was the most frightening thing that has ever happened to me.

i bet you'll never forget it if you have such a close encounter with lightning. so i'll never underestimate it when i hear them close the golf course because of lightning. this is my advice: you wouldn't want to be NEXT to the ball of light if the lightning really crashes next to you. it really is no joke so if you hear the siren that will be followed by the announcement " we are sorry, play is suspended until further notice", take cover immediately !! don't leave anything up to chance

golfing makes you WILD !!

isn't this picture sooo cute !! it gave me a new idea for my next photo album ! golfing makes you go WILD ! wild like the animals in the safari/zoo lol  

it's gonna take some time to complete this album cos photo shop skills we be needed but i'm really excited to see the cool effect i can get from my room. be excited !!! cos i am :) 

i'm actually super excited to get started with this project but i've got to sleep ! got a game at 805 tomorrow morning  ! 

its a new start for my golf training spree !! no more lazy 12 hour sleeps please 

lightning struck my house: a new beginning

can you believe it !!! my house got struck by lightning !!!
my dad says its not very common for it to happen but i think this is already the second time it's happened since i've moved in more than 10 years ago. i must add that i've never heard it happen to anyone before.

anyway i feel like this incident is a sign. sign that things are going to change. no matter what happens, it'll change for the better. be it my golf or my relationships. its a sign of good luck !

today i played an OK golf game. at least i hit more decent shots today and i managed 4 greens on regulation. great improvement from my 1 green on regulation last week lol

after the lightning strike, i have new found determination and enthusiasm. i believe i am able to improve my golf and i am committed to improve my golf. i trust in the process of improvement.

no more feeling demoralised. no more being depressed. no more mood-iness. no more crying. no more being frustrated. only hope and happiness.

thank you daddy for always encouraging me and being there for me through my ups and downs. daddy is da best !!















check out this book about probabilities. they write about the chances of getting struck by lightning. what about your HOUSE being struck by lightning ??

silly bee thought i was a plant !!

i took pictures for my latest photo album "in memory of the times in the trees" today
go to my facebook page to view all the pictures. i decided that i would only put 5 photos in each album because if not i'd run out of poses and facial expressions (especially because i want to smile in all my pictures)

this album is meaningful because it'll remind me never to give up on myself even when i keep getting into situations in the trees because i can always laugh at myself afterwards.
ps: i think i actually did make those faces when i was playing, just that no one was around to see

anyway, see how i'm wearing green shorts ??
the funny story i want to share is that there was this bee that kept flying around my shorts and my thighs thinking i'm some sort of plant when i was taking the photos!!! i don't dislike bees, i just don't want to get stung by them.

hard work part 2

its 6am and i'm still awake. Can't get to sleep because i'm tingling all over with excitement

635am i decide to stop tossing and turning in bed, turn on the lights and change into golfing gear

645am i'm out the door and waiting for a cab (grrr wait till its past 7 to get a cab), i almost give up to go home and crawl into bed. I remember that i'm wearing earrings today and feel confident and sexy

715am i reach the club and order breakfast. I feel proud that my determination to practice hard is coming back, nevermind that i haven't slept. At least i'm out of my pyjamas and besides i've slept about 12 hours each of the past few days i've been moping.

744am i'm done with my yummy thick cut kaya toast and am about to start my day of efficient golf practice

745am it starts to rain. A difference of just one minute decides my schedule. I'll update my blog first. The wind is blowing through the clubhouse and i feel chilly (weird cos i'm always sweating so much here). small rain drops fly with the wind and land on my phone screen. But nothing can stop my determination today.

It is my determination to start on part 2 of hard work. Determination to improve my golf. Determination not to let all the obstacles i faced prevent me from moving forward. Determination not to be afraid.

I finished watching taiwan series 'my queen'. One sentence i really found meaningful is that you can choose how you feel in just one second. Choosing to be optimistic takes just a second, choosing to give up on yourself also takes a second. Why not make the choice that will enrich your life.

Make the choice of loving yourself today. Do something that makes you feel happy. Even if you feel like nothing is going well, that no one appreciates anything you do, love yourself. don't wait for others to show they love you. If you don't love yourself who will??

I know it really isn't easy to find loving emotions when you're in a low place. I've been there. But don't worry, if i can do it, so can you !

Sending you love, wherever you are.

how to play golf with more confidence

confidence and passion increase with ability. therefore, the greater your golfing ability, the more confidence you will have on and off the golf course.

confidence starts even before you address the ball. when you're looking at your target and setting up, there is no doubt or fear of shanking the shot, hitting it short or entering a hazard. then when you are about to hit the ball, confidence means you have conviction to impact, compress the ball and let it soar down the target line.

everyone wants to play with confidence. Doctor Bob Rotella wrote a book called "Golf is a Game of Confidence".

It's easy to play golf confidently when you're playing well and shooting low scores. But how do you do it when you're in a bad patch and haven't been playing well??

If my opening statement is true, then the opposite must be true too. that your confidence decreases when your ability to play good golf drops.

If like me, you've experienced a time when your golf seems to be at its worst and you couldn't ever play any lousier scores, then this is dedicated to you. the process may not be easy but its definitely worth it because when your confidence returns, playing golf will be so much more fun and the improved golfing score will be oh so sweet. mmm


step 1: think about something that is going well in your life
it might not be related to golf
eg: a loving family, a pet that always makes you smile

step 2: analyse all aspects of your game and list down which is the worst area and why
currently, my worst aspect is my iron shots

step 3: compare the worst area to other aspects of the game
you should find that the part of the golf game you are most dissatisfied with is only one aspect of the whole golf game which is made up of so many areas

step 4 : focus on the parts of your game that are going well
for me, i am driving the ball longer off the tee and i rarely miss a fairway over the 18 holes

step 5: don't think too much into the situation
its all temporary ! things will definitely turn around soon. the less of your thought you put into the bad things, the more likely that they will go away

look forward to good times my friends !

i resolve never to give up on myself and my golf again

i know it probably sounds funny when you hear a girl saying she likes housework because in this day and age especially in singapore, it doesn't seem that easy to find girls who are first of all willing to do housework and even if they do it, seldom do they actually enjoy it. maybe because my mom was never a house-work type of woman, good habits of cleaning up my room and study table were never really cultivated since young. and we always had house help so my room was never so messy. even when i was studying in melbourne, i didn't have as much stuff as i do in my house now. so i find my room often getting cluttered easily. probably due to a lack of a good system to put my stuff when i come home such as my gym bag, things i buy etc

i just cleared up the basket of clean clothes that have been lying around for about a week. and then i swept and mopped the floor. waah i feel so refreshed seeing my floor clear of stuff. i read that because i'm born in the year of the snake (according to the chinese calendar), i'm more likely to clutter up the floor, leave things lying all over the place such that only a snake would be able to slither and maneuvre through the mess.

anyway, i find that my life gets more and more out of control when my room is messy. and that includes my golfing progress. but i find it very very troublesome to do laundry. first you have to put the clothes in the machine, take them out to hang (which reminds me that i need to go do that now) and then take them in the next day, whenever i'm next free, or when someone else wants to hang their clothes. troublesome !! cos i then have to fold/iron/hang up/organise the clean clothes into my various cupboards after that. so many steps. grrr

however, the benefit of doing all this and cleaning up my room is that i always feel better and more clear-headed when i see a neat and clean room. Therefore, i resolve to keep my floor clear of stuff and maintain neat-ness in my room. because the look of my room affects my mood, this resolution directly means that i resolve never to give up on myself and my golf again. it's a tough journey but i cannot give up.

best way out of a low point in life

after being stuck in this lousy place of playing bad golf and not really knowing what to do about it, i discovered that the way out of this low point is not to sleep all day and refuse to face up to whats happening. the way out of it is to plan for the next step. plan for how to move forward in the next chapter of this journey.

but sometimes it really isn't easy when you're feeling down. it almost feels like everything isn't going your way and you start to descend down this spiral of unhappiness.

This is my remedy to picking yourself up
-first think about something that makes you happy
-go out and do things that you enjoy or go out with people you feel happy with (for me its going out with my sister to look at cute things or get cheap bargains)
-then sit down reassess that your situation isn't all as bad as it seems because everything else is actually really good in your life
-come up with a plan on what needs working on, how you will go about doing it and how much time will be needed

hope this can help anyone who is feeling really low and can't seem to get out of feeling lousy. Smile and Look forward to good times ahead !!

its tougher than you read in the books

you read that often golfers deprove after trying to implement something new in their swing or golf game. but no one prepares for exactly HOW mentally challenging the process really is.

especially for me who is trying so hard to improve my game, it can really be very demoralising to see my golfing scores stagnate and even become worse.

i think i'm a mentally strong person in that i don't give up easily and am always very optimistic. i was very proud when jonathon praised me for having fighting spirit. i really don't like to lose. it must have been cultivated from my days in cedar girls' secondary where doing our best was part of the school culture. we were all for girl power and really cheered our hearts out during competitions.

I was playing in a match play against a very strong opponent and i realised that i really need to toughen up mentally if i want to continue on this journey towards improving my golf and being a scratch handicapper. I've learnt that it is so much easier to give up and just slump into laziness or enter a state of 'heck care already'

on the first nine, it was already such a tough fight. everytime she won a hole i would fight very very hard to win the next hole. by the 8th hole i felt so exhausted because i wasn't playing very well but i was really pushing myself to hit a good iron shot and chip and putt better. i really wanted to give up because i was 2 down. but then i tried to think about my secondary school days and how we never gave up until the last deciding monent. and i managed to find more energy and determination to keep fighting. by the last three holes we were in a 'dormie' which means i was 3 down with 3 more holes to play.

i managed to win the next two holes and we were on the last tee, i was one down with one to play. and i really wasn't hoping for much. i just wanted to get a par to end the game well. and hopefully if i parred it then i would finish 18 holes all square and maybe we'd play sudden death. she sunk an amazing biride putt and i was going for par. and that was it.

it really sucks to lose. the feeling where you know you just weren't playing at your best. its this annoying nibbling feeling inside that just makes you sad, frustrated, hopeful all at once. i know the loss shouldn't be such a big deal because i really didn't play well. the fact that my 93 managed to play her 80 all the way to the last hole is already a mean feat. yet i also feel hopeful knowing that at my standard, and putting in more substantial practice and hard work, i can only improve

feeling lethargic

my dad has this theory that when you feel tired its either because you need to do some exercise or you've slept too much. i've found that they both apply.

i was feeling very driven and motivated to work hard on my golf and especially the short game but i must say i have getting more and more demoralised by my inability to play well with my new irons. when my left wrist hurt too much till i couldn't even grip the golf club, i took a one week break off golf and didn't touched my clubs for 7 days.
that brought me into this lazy slump where i've been sleeping about 10 hours a day and lazing around at home.

ok working on my blog and facebook page should not be considered lazing but i mean lazy in the sense that i'm not out there working on my golf. i think the lack of activity is making me more and more lazy.

i believe in the power of momentum and when i'm really in the heat of practicing my short game i can practice for hours at millenium and not feel tired. but now that i've lost that momentum, i'm finding it hard to even change out of my pyjamas or leave the house. i just feel like eating maggi mee for my meals

i have the semi-finals of the match play competition tomorrow. hope my putting practice on my golf putting mat at home will pay off tomorrow. i think my opponent is a strong player.

Bob Rotella: enter a competition thinking you are the best until proven otherwise
(don't be intimidated by others)

i can do it !!

cathay cup match play april 2010

i won the quarter finals of the cathay cup match play today :)
won 3 up with 1 to play

didn't play as well as i had hoped but then i haven't really touched my golf clubs for almost a week. my iron shots were at least getting distance but accuracy was hard to predict. i would either hook the ball or hit it way right and if i tried to compensate by aiming more left or more right, i still didn't get the ball to where i wanted it to go.

had only one green on regulation which is far from my goal of 12 out of 16 holes
32 putts. not too bad
played overall gross 93

was really trying to focus on keeping my right knee pointing inwards while rotating my hips on the backswing in order to get more body coil

currently, my tee shots are still the best part of my game which is quite useless if my short game isn't too great. although i must say i can't complain because i was actually chipping and putting quite well, just didn't chip it near enough to get par and didn't putt it well enough either

at least i still have a chance to fight back and play an even better score on thursday. playing against a 9 handicapper so i'll get 6 strokes from index 1 to 6.

i'm just gonna work on bringing my BEST GAME to win !

think about putting at a good speed for the ball to drop into the hole based on the line that you are aiming for :)

if anyone reading this has a match play coming up, all the best !!

cathay cup match play april 2010

playing in a match play competition against a 30 handicapper tomorrow afternoon on the bukit course. i probably have to give her one stroke each hole. it sounds quite scary and stressful because i am usually the one receiving strokes from other people because i have one of the highest handicaps in the A division. i think they have combined us with the B division ladies due to lack of participants in the competition haha

i haven't touched my clubs for almost a week now and i'm hoping for the best tomorrow. been having a dilemma whether to use my new clubs or old clubs to play. after much deliberation, i have decided to play with my old irons and woods but my new driver which has been giving me very good distance off the tee-box (happy happy)

i'll need to warm up at the range with my old irons first to get re-accustomed with them. wish me all the best ! and i hope to share good news tomorrow :)

left wrist injury is nothing serious. phew

managed to go get my left wrist checked out today. i went to visit doctor teo my TCM *traditional chinese medicine* doctor.

he says that its a very normal type of injury for sports people. something to do with the muscles and tendons reacting when you hit an improper golf shot. probably because i had a slight injury and didn't let it rest, the muscles got tighter and tighter till it was so painful.

he did a massage on my left forearm and hand and within just half an hour, i felt so much better. it's only been 12 hours since i saw him and the pain has decreased by 80% ! whoo hooo !!

i think i have an amazing body. everytime i get a slight injury or rash, i take a shorter time to recover than the doctor says. i think doctors always say a longer time just to be safe.

eg 1: when i had the terrible rash. doctor said it'd take about 1 to 2 weeks to recover and then to continue taking the medicine for 5 days after the rash and itch goes away. took only 2 days for the rashes to totally go away and then i took the medicine for another 5 days :)

eg 2: when i jurt my right wrist, dr teo said i'd have to let it rest 2 weeks, but within 3 days the pain was all gone !

whoo hoo thanks wonderful body for being so good at recovering !

i have to rest from golf for 2-3 days at least so this weekend i'll be having a lot of time to do other golf related things like create more golfing collages on polyvore and taking more golfing fashion pictures.

i'm looking out for cheap polo tees so i can't print some designs on them as an experiment and also to take more pictures ! wheee

even when i'm injured and can't play golf, i am grateful for the experience of learning about my injury and having free time to do other things than just training golf the whole day. i'll also be working more on the mental aspect of my golf game.

golfing apparel for ladies

i've been searching internet sites on golfing apparel for ladies to get more pictures that i can use to create polyvore collages.

lori's golf shoppe has a pink section devoted to selling all pink accessories for ladies golf ! my favourite ! heehee i'm taking alot of images from this site

i like the taylormade burner pink magnetic golf ball marker on pinkgolfballs the pink color golf bag is sooo cute !
i found a lot alot of nice items so look forward to more of my golfing inspired collages created using polyvore

female golfers have a challenge because they have boobs

i find that as a female golfer, boobs are a tricky area. on one hand they help us look beautiful and feminine, some might even say graceful. but on the other hand they do form a sort of restriction when you set up because they are obstructions between your arms. i wear sport bras because they flatten the chest and allow my arms to swing through more freely but i'm currently experimenting with getting a more feminine golf look. the main issue i have is getting over the feeling that i'm sticking my chest out so much like as though i'm saying to the world "hey check out my boobies" because in actual fact i don't think people actually think of it that way. breasts are just a natural part of being a woman and regardless of size, i should embrace them and be proud of what i have

i find that sport bras help to flatten the chest and lessen some of the problem but then those without padding create the chance that you will expose your two points. haha if you know what i'm referring to. it may not not be an issue in the western culture where it is seen as sexy and provocative, but in asian culture, it is often frowned upon. i myself think that it is inappropriate and attracts unwanted attention which becomes distracting while playing golf. there are sport bras that do offer padding but they are not durable and the padding shifts out of position or loses shape after being thrown in the washing machine. maybe i'm supposed to hand wash them?

sport bras provide support and prevents the breasts from swinging around and just basically being a distraction

lately, i've been experimenting and trying to get used to wearing bras made for sport. they make me feel a bit insecure as i feel like my chest is sticking out alot when i set up. but maybe i'm just not used to it yet. other female golfers don't seem to be bothered by it so i guess it shouldn't be an issue for me. i'm reading into it too much maybe.

however i find that bras, sport bras and bras designed for sport are much like clothes in that sometimes its hard to find a good fit. maybe because there are limited brands at a reasonable price i would be willing to pay, i find it difficult to find many models that fit me properly.

the problem i had with the sport bras were that the straps could be a bit short and sometimes they felt like they were cutting into my shoulders, yet going up a size would make it loose around the chest area. so confusing. problems i face in looking for a bra designed for sport would be that they make sizes in S M L and not so much according to the cup size or bustline like those in normal bras that state two parts. the number and the cup eg:34C. the other problem would be that they are so overpriced. yes they are specially designed but i wouldn't pay $60 for something that doesn't even fit me perfectly

left wrist injury

this sucks. i wake up and my left wrist isn't better. it hurts to put any form of pressure on it or even bend it just slightly.

every night i imagine that when i wake up my wrist will be cured. it hasn't happened yet.

don't you wish that injuries can miraculously disappear and how cool would it be if it really happened by willing it to.

oh left wrist left wrist i love you so much and i can't wait for you to get well so we can play great golf together again ! imagine all the great scores we can play once you are better. i am sooo looking forward to it

hope i will get sponsored :)

i'm in the midst of getting my facebook page up and running. i feel a bit embarassed to publish it because first of all i'm not some golfing celebrity. not yet anyway. and there isn't much to see on my page. i decided to start a photo album of golfing fashion. i wear my golfing outfits. i hope that it can inspire others in mixing and matching their golfing pieces because sometimes it can get very boring i know. very often because its hard to match bright colored shirts with any other colored bottom other than black, brown, beige, blue. anyway i hope that i can also promote proper golfing attire among female golfers.

even if golf is seen as an old person's sport, we ladies can still dress and look good on the golf course. i always find that wearing an outfit that makes me look good and feel comfortable greatly increases my confidence on and off the golf course. and naturally i play better too.

these starting photos are of my new tops i just bought today from arnold palmer. was really a good bargain because i only paid $22.50 each after discount heehee. the shorts were good buys too mainly because they aren't branded and aren't marketed as golfing shorts. i got the green one at far east plaza (last piece so i just had to try it even though it didn't look my size but turned out to fit me perfectly YAY) and the checked one i got from BHG at bishan junction 8. only $22 :)

maybe someone will offer to sponsor me after seeing me look so nice in golfing clothes. maybe i can even be a model for them or a spokesperson for their golfing wear line. heehee then maybe they will sell more clothes that suit my body.

improving the mental aspect of golf

i've been resting my left wrist for the past two days

during this time i've been doing more work on my blogs, facebook page and also the mental aspect of my golf

i try to relax my body, visualize my perfect swing

in sports psychology, it has been proven that people who visualize themselves shooting 3pointers in basketball improve their accuracy by the same amount within the same time as people who spend the same amount of time actually practicing shooting 3pointers

even though i'm lying down, i visualize myself addressing the ball, how i grip the club, what the club feels like in my hands. i also try to imagine my surroundings and what the view is like. i draw a line connecting the sweet spot of my club head to my heart. on the backswing i feel myself getting into the right position and imagine myself working on the things i am trying to take note of in my swing. then on the downswing i feel my body driving into the ball and using my body to compress the ball. then i follow through with my club pointing down the target line and finish through smoothly :)

basically i visualize myself swinging the club the way i want to swing it all the time and imagine getting good contact with the ball. then when i know i have hit a good shot in my imagination, the actual feelings of satisfaction and happiness come to me naturally.

i do this in conjunction with creating the emotions that i would feel from hitting a good shot everytime. i imagine myself smiling with happiness after hitting good shots throughout the good game. the shots include sinking long putts, hitting long drives, solid iron shots and chipping and pitching the ball to near the pin.

in golf, they usually talk about visualizing your shot. this means the ball flight: where it starts out, what height and how much draw or fade you want it to achieve.

i haven't yet read about visualizing yourself and the emotions that are attached to hitting great shots

left wrist injury

a new injury for me is something for me to learn from and i appreciate it and overcome it

i hurt my left wrist last friday. someone said something to me. something about comparing my golf skills to his. i didn't feel upset by what he said but i was more affected by why he had to say things like that.

i know i cannot control what other people do. i can only control my reactions towards it. i thought i wasn't affected by the comment, but turns out it did. and i injured my left wrist on the tee shot of the next hole. it hurt but wasn't something unbearable so i continued.

saturday i practiced my short game in the morning because i thought it would be less straining on my arms. practiced from 8am to about 12 noon. then i had a break before premier team training again at 3pm. by then i could still hit shots but it hurt to try and hit cut shots or flop shots. basically it hurt to do anything related to scooping the wrists.

i thought my wrist would be fine so i went to practice on the range on sunday morning. i wore my wrist guard and i was hitting good shots and getting good compression. i felt that my wrist was even getting better. i left at 9am feeling very pleased that i was finally able to hit decent shots with my new irons. i couldn't wait till 1pm to tee off my 18 hole game with sixuan and her dad.

to my disappointment, i played the worst 9holes of my life that day. i was hitting my fairway woods really really badly and i almost topped all my iron shots, even my chips and pitches were horrible, always landing short of the green. aargh i was sooo frustrated. the highlight of the day was being able to hit 1 really good 8iron shot which went farther than i estimated and landed past the green. after the 18holes i decided to play another 9 holes with my mom. hah i actually played better on the last 9 holes even though i must have been much more tired.

i think it will be my first and last ever 27 hole game. it must have put a toll on my injured left wrist because i went to the driving range just now after resting the whole of yesterday (tuesday) and i even found it painful to grip the club. it hurt even more to impact the ground.

sighs

i love my body and i don't want to injure it. i'll treat this as another learning experience to better understand my golf swing and how to cope with external stimuli